Today, I reached the lesson about sun salutations in the 30 Day Yoga Challenge. It was a swift but ultimately satisfying lesson, full of downward dog and warrior poses and cobra poses, all things I love. It’s the kind of routine I want to memorize and whip out in the middle of a long day of work, or in the morning before I get to it. I went through the motions (literally), feeling warm and happy afterwards.
Only, not too long after I didn’t feel so happy. In fact, I felt downright anxious. Not quite to the palms-sweaty-knees-weak-moms-spaghetti-level, but jittery and gross for sure. I’ve heard that yoga can give you an emotional response and I’ve sort of felt it affect my mood in the past, the way listening to a good song or watching a clip on youtube can. Nothing like this. Had I unlocked the powers of yoga? Did they actually suck?
And then I remembered. Not even an hour before, I’d had a latte. Normally this is not a big deal but these days I rarely drink coffee (because when I do I drink eighty cups a day) and so I’m more sensitive to caffeine than I used to be. Drinking a cup of coffee and then sloshing that coffee around for fifteen minutes was the villain in the drama, not yoga. I had not reached enlightenment. I had not fallen into Anxiety Nirvana. I was just being a dumbass.